Welcome Fall, Welcome Change!

Welcome, welcome, fall, the very BEST time of year! I can’t believe October is over already!  Fall is my favorite time of year and October is, without a doubt, my favorite month, in no small part because my son was born in October.  Many of the moments surrounding my son’s birth were filled with chaos and ended up in a blur.  I do, however,  have a beautiful, clear memory of lying in my hospital bed the morning after my son was born, looking out the window and witnessing the most amazing sunrise showcasing the dazzling colors of the changing fall leaves, and knowing that my life would never be the same.  Everyone had gone home to get some rest, and it was just my newborn and I, all alone for the first time.

This is one of the moments in life that brings me contentment and joy.  This is the moment I often call to mind whenever I need to re-focus on the things that are truly important and rid myself of the daily garbage that can drag me down.  This is why October is so important to me.  This is the time of year when I realize how short life really is and how fast it goes by.  This is a time for reflection for me; a time to take stock and be thankful for all the wonderful and amazing things in my life, among the most important, my (no longer a baby) boy.

Like any mother, my son has inspired me every day to try to be a better person and better mother.  He makes me want to be the person he thinks I am.  Every choice that I’ve made since he was born was, in a way, inspired by him and my desire to work with my husband to provide the best life possible for our little family.   I don’t regret any of the choices I made.

I wanted to be able to be with my child, every day, as much as possible.  Of course, it wasn't always possible. A living has to be made, after all.  But, I was extremely lucky to be working for a law firm that provided 100% of my pay during a 4 month maternity leave.  In addition, they had on-site day care for parents returning from maternity/paternity leave, so that I could see my son and have him near me every day during this important transition period. My husband and I managed for me to home with my son throughout his entire kindergarten year, the first year he can remember relocating to a new state.  I was there for him, trying to help him make friends and become independent.  I've never had to miss a birthday, a holiday, or an important first experience.  For this, I am eternally grateful.

Every decision I’ve made has been made deliberately and with the full understanding of the possible consequences.   Every career move, every relocation, each with specific pros and cons carefully weighed.  I would never say that I was living an inauthentic life or a life that I didn’t want.   If I didn’t want the life I had created, I would have made different decisions.

I say all this as a preface to the point I am going to make that it is time for change, and that yearning for change going forward doesn’t mean that I would change anything in the past.  Change is a part of life.  As I watch my son grow and change from a little kid into a young man, I realize that the decisions I make going forward will need to grow and change too.   I realize now that there are a number of things that I have always wanted to do and now is the time to try to do them.  Now is all we have.   Everyone does the best they can with what they have and what they know.  When you know better, you do better (I think I heard that on Oprah).  Well, now I know better.   This is the year for me to start making different choices and doing things differently.   This is the year for me to not only embrace the past and my past decisions, but to embrace the change.

Hear Me Roar!

I have to admit that I started this blog rather naively.  I simply wanted to try something completely new.
I got on Twitter roughly a year ago and had a somewhat rough start there, with cyber stalkers and hurtful people that took advantage of the public nature of Twitter to interfere in my personal life.  (But, that's a story for another post).

My natural tendency is to take things slowly, think things through, weigh the positives and negatives carefully.  After participating in several "personality tests" through my employers over the years (Myers Briggs, among the most well-known http://www.myersbriggs.org), it is no surprise to me when I Always Always Always come out on the far "introspective" end of the "introvert/extrovert" spectrum.  I am what is also  known as an "analyzer".   I need time to process information.  I am not quick on the fly, nor do I make rash or spontaneous decisions.

Understanding this about myself has helped me immensely over the past years.  I have learned not to be so hard on myself or to see my lack of spontaneity or the inability to respond quickly and decisively in any given situation as a character flaw.  I am learning to embrace who I am. My carefully thought out nature makes me trustworthy, loyal, and someone you can count on to follow through in any given situation. If I were a man, I would be the "strong, silent type."  But, being a woman, I have found that I am more often discounted as being unopinionated or easily railroaded. Neither of which is true.



I am also, by no means, someone who is not interested in new experiences or in being challenged.  Am I slow to change?  Most definately.  Do I enjoy it once I decide to make the leap?  Absolutely! Maybe more so because I know that I have not let fear rule my decision.

So here I am, with my very own blog, and feeling a little giddy!  I have to say my husband's comment that a blog is like a pin in haystack and the likelihood that anyone will actually read what I write, actually made it easier for me to take the leap. Whether that was how he meant me to take it, I'm not really sure. With that in mind though, I think of this as more of an online journal than anything else. I would certainly like some encouragement and advice along the way, but if no one reads this and encouragement is not received, so be it.  I am doing something new and learning and growing from it.

All that being said, what I really wanted to say is simply that I have been overwhelmed and awed by the bloggers that I have found on Twitter and it is because of them that I am encouraged to start this blog. I am humbled by the creativity of the scrapbookers out there; the insight of the professional writers and business professionals; the bravery of the mommy bloggers who bare their souls and expose their heartbreaks, their mistakes, and even (or maybe especially) the tongue-in-cheek posts  that remind me not to take myself so seriously.

I am soaking it up, drinking it all in, analyzing it. And I know that I have only just begun to touch my toe in the waters of what is out there. I have even been so inspired by everyone that I am also considering starting my own creative business.  Of course, this will entail much future analyzing, planning, re-analyzing, re-planning, etc.  But, I fully intend to take that leap of faith too. So stay tuned...

In the meantime, I am here to stay. So, watch out, hear me roar! ;-)

April 2011 Crop

 These are a few of my completed pages from my last weekend crop in Shepherdstown, WV.  I have to give it up to Valerie at Creative Crops for putting on another amazing weekend. 

Besides offering an opportunity to escape from the "real world" for few days and completely immerse yourself in your hobby, the people behind Creative Crops work hard to ensure that everything is taken care of for you.

We are treated to a variety of knowledgeable vendors, 6 feet of table space, gift bags, great food, snacks, music, comfy rooms, 24 hour crop room, massages, pedicures, and of course, let's not forget the wonderful hotel staff who take drink orders and deliver to the crop room, for anyone too busy to take a break at the bar! 


I also have to mention the amazing door prizes! I actually won the Cricut Gypsy  at the previous event, and was able to take a class to learn new ways to work with it at this event.

At this crop I managed to work in a full body massage and a pedicure, and my table won a free weekend at the next crop, which we are already planning!

I just love my scrapbooking weekends!  Not only am I more productive than any time I try to crop at home, but I meet so many interesting and fun people and find myself truly rejuvinated.  It's my favorite "me" time and one of the most important things I treat myself to every year.  

It's so difficult to take time away from family and responsibilities.  We've all been there.  Putting ourselves last on th list.  Often, when there is time, I want to spend it With my family, not Away from them.  But, I do feel that giving myself the time away a couple of times a year to indulge myself doing something I love so much, makes me a better  person, for myself and the people in my life.


And, just look at the end product!  I love that I will be able to pass down to my son, beautiful, creative and unique memory books for him to him look back on his childhood and show his children.

So, while I am indulging myself, I am also doing something  important and lasting for my family.  What better hobby could there be? :D

Is there anyone out there who has a crop that they regularly attend and are as excited about as I am? I would love to hear all about it!